The no.1 Factor In Finding Soul-mate
More than anything else, we are attracted to individuals who look like we do, as well as share the same wealth, social status, and outlook towards family and fidelity, CNN and the Associated Press report of new research from Cornell University in New York. In other words, opposites do not attract.
Conventional wisdom has long held that beautiful women seek socially dominant men, while rich and confident guys look for the most gorgeous ladies. Turns out, that's not right. At least, if you want to make it last a lifetime. Instead, we should be seeking an ideal match--someone who is equal to us. And when we do that, marriage has the greatest chance of long-term success. The Cornell researchers say that when there are too many differences between couples, it causes instability. It's actually harmful to the marriage if we hook up with someone who is far better looking or has a much higher social status. Why? Years into the relationship, the person of higher status might be tempted to "trade up" to a better partner. There's much less chance of that happening between equals.
The Cornell study was based on questionnaires completed by 978 students ages 18 to 24 who were asked to rank the importance they placed on 10 attributes in a long-term partner. Then they had to rank themselves based on those attributes, which were:
--Wealth and status
--Family commitment
--Physical appearance
--Sexual fidelity
Those who rated themselves highly as individuals were also more selective than those who did not think so well of themselves.
The takeaway:
Marriages between similar matches are more common and have a far greater chance of success than marriages between opposites. Stop your search right now for the highest-quality partner. Instead look in the mirror and go find someone who looks and acts like you do. The findings were published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Scientists Monday.
More than anything else, we are attracted to individuals who look like we do, as well as share the same wealth, social status, and outlook towards family and fidelity, CNN and the Associated Press report of new research from Cornell University in New York. In other words, opposites do not attract.
Conventional wisdom has long held that beautiful women seek socially dominant men, while rich and confident guys look for the most gorgeous ladies. Turns out, that's not right. At least, if you want to make it last a lifetime. Instead, we should be seeking an ideal match--someone who is equal to us. And when we do that, marriage has the greatest chance of long-term success. The Cornell researchers say that when there are too many differences between couples, it causes instability. It's actually harmful to the marriage if we hook up with someone who is far better looking or has a much higher social status. Why? Years into the relationship, the person of higher status might be tempted to "trade up" to a better partner. There's much less chance of that happening between equals.
The Cornell study was based on questionnaires completed by 978 students ages 18 to 24 who were asked to rank the importance they placed on 10 attributes in a long-term partner. Then they had to rank themselves based on those attributes, which were:
--Wealth and status
--Family commitment
--Physical appearance
--Sexual fidelity
Those who rated themselves highly as individuals were also more selective than those who did not think so well of themselves.
The takeaway:
Marriages between similar matches are more common and have a far greater chance of success than marriages between opposites. Stop your search right now for the highest-quality partner. Instead look in the mirror and go find someone who looks and acts like you do. The findings were published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Scientists Monday.
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